One major recent event that feminists need to talk about

The rape game: The one major piece of latest news that we feminists have not discussed enough!

Yes don’t be surprised. In today’s modern world, something as hideous as a “rape game” exists. The direct proof of that is the Cologne Sexual Assaults on New Year’s Eve.

I am a big feminist. And I follow many blogs and pages that deal with feminist issues. Most of those are Western, because it is no hidden secret the Westerners tend to be more vocal on women rights. However the one major piece of feminist opinions recently was about the news of Chris Gayle flirting with the news reporter and it was everywhere on the social media. Whereas I was surprised that the Cologne mass New Year attacks went by unnoticed by many except a few. Why was that so? No heads to be scratched there; it is because of the ethnicity of the perpetrators involved. Do we feminists only speak up and criticize when it’s “safe” to do so? In the light of what happened in Cologne this New Year’s eve, we should wonder why is it that we indulge in selective criticism and empathy. More than often, when it comes to choosing between women rights and trying not sounding racist, we choose to be the latter.

The massive wave of sexual assaults that occurred at New Year’s Eve in Cologne is a kind of a rape game that has been etched in history. The rape game or as it is called in Arabic popularly as “taharush” is an activity wherein a group of men surround the victim and then a few of them go ahead and rape them. This is clearly the definition of rape culture. The one case famous in the western media regarding this is of Lara Logan.

“Such crimes are committed by groups of young men … mostly when there are large gatherings of people, such as demonstrations,” Germany’s Federal Criminal Police Office (BKA) said in a statement according to newspaper Welt am Sonntag. “They range from sexual harassment to rape.”

This was a huge atrocity which deserved much attention and discourse which went relatively less talked about because the color of the skin of the criminals involved and their religious beliefs. It is true that if something similar had been carried out by white men, everybody would be talking about it? Why are people of other cultures held to different standards? Do we tend to tolerate crime and immorality in the name of tolerance and multi-culturalism? Criticizing the culture of a particular region does not make one racist. For example, Dowry is a huge part of the Pakistan/Indian culture, and when I speak against it, it doesn’t mean that I am racist. It just means that I give a damn about women’s issues. We need to realize that not all cultures are good enough when it comes to women’s rights. It has been surveyed time and again that there are certain countries which give more importance to women’s rights than others. I myself am from one such county. Pakistan is struggling to maintain its identity as a democratic state while on the other hand, an official implementation of Sharia law as demanded by the Taliban, ISIS, and other radical Islamist local bodies would further worsen the situation of women. Things are not much different in other Islamic countries such as Iran or KSA, because they derive their values from an ancient set of beliefs (religion) rather than democracy and equality.

Instead of being fed by conspiracy theories and rallying for BDS movements against the only decent democracy in the Middle Eastern region, and the one which has values closest to Western values, we should focus on criticizing values from around the world which are in a direct clash with women rights. Instead of trying to voice support for a symbol of oppression and encouraging women to “walk a mile in her hijab” maybe we should ask women around the world to sympathize and show solidarity with thousands of women worldwide who are forced into wearing it. 

As Gaby Hinsliff writes in her piece in The Guardian “We mustn’t shy away from awkward questions because the answers may give righteous comfort to bleak enemies of liberalism everywhere.” Refusing to talk about such acts in fear of sounding racist or islamo-phobic is just giving such criminal minded people leverage and freedom to do what they want as they feed on the cloud of “tolerance” that the western society is guilted into acting upon. We feminists should join hands with liberals who are not scared of calling a spade a spade and work towards preventing rape culture all around the world. 

Fast Times...

     Starting high school is a significant occasion in one’s life.  Where you go to high school can affect the friends you make, the classes you take and maybe even the colleges you get into. Joshua, my eldest son is in the process of applying, testing and deciding, which high school to attend in the fall.   After visiting schools and sampling the food in the cafeteria (because we all know a 14-year-old boy is going to go where the chicken nuggets are the best), he selected a total of five schools. This week Josh took his magnet exams, for the three Baltimore County public schools he is applying to.  

     Initially, we looked at four private schools in the Baltimore Area. Joshua shadowed at Loyola-Blakefield, Calvert Hall, Gilman, and Archbishop Curley.   In the end he narrowed in down to two private schools, Loyola-Blakefield and Calvert Hall. In December he took the Baltimore Archdiocese High School Placement Test (HSPT), required for entrance into any Baltimore Area Catholic high school.  In addition, he applied to magnet programs at George Washington Carver, Eastern Tech, and Parkville High.

     While we wait on decisions from all of the schools, I figured I would do some comparisons of things like -class size, class offerings, and tuition.  While ultimately the decision is Joshua’s I want to be able to give him some guidance.  In Joshua’s order of preference here is what I have learned about each school.

 

      1.  George Washington Carver (Information Technology/Interactive Media Production)

Ranked #603 in US News and World Reports Top 1000 High Schools in the Nation.

The school was recently rebuilt and according to the Baltimore County Public School website the new school building was opened in August of 2012. 

•   Current student enrollment is 853 
•   Class size 27.6 -29.0
•   AP offerings 22
•    Tuition – free (public school)

2   2.   Eastern Tech (Engineering)

Ranked #556 in US News and World Reports Top 1000 High Schools in the Nation

·   

•  Current student enrollment 1,106
• Class size 27.6 -29.0
•  AP offerings 16
• Tuition – free (public school)

3   3.  Loyola - Blakefield  

A private Catholic institution, Loyola -Blakefield is a Jesuit school for boys with grades K-12 founded in 1852.

•    Current student enrollment 984
•   Class size 20
•  AP offerings 18
•  Tuition - $19, 125

4   4.   Calvert Hall 

 

Founded in 1845 Calvert Hall is a Catholic and LaSallian college prep school for boys.

• Current student enrollment 1175
• Class size 17
•  AP offerings 23
• Tuition - $14,275

5   5.   Parkville High School (Computer Science)

Parkville is considered our ‘home’ school.  If not accepted in to any of the magnet schools and does not receive scholarships to the private schools, this is the school he will attend. He will just not be in the computer science track. 

• Current student enrollment 1,601
•   Class size 27.6-29.0
• AP offerings 17
• Tuition - free (public school)

I think that the hardest part of the application process, for my son, is all the different exams.  Now that the hard part is over for him; the waiting for acceptance letters is the hardest for me.  We will find out in mid- February if he has been accepted to Loyola and/or Calvert Hall, and mid- March for the magnet programs.  Here’s hoping he gets his top choice – wish us luck!

Growing up 90's Style

Very Much So! 

Internet killed the fun! Growing up in the 90s was mind blowing. There were no iPhones, Facebook, and you didn’t have to worry about someone posting a video of you online. They (whoever they are) said that 80s babies were the last generation to have fun before technology made its growth spurt. I was born in 1987, but raised in the 90s. My childhood memories involved me running around with the neighborhood kids, and fond memories of my mother telling me to take a shower because I smell like outside. 

Oh how I miss being a kid! Not because I have to pay bills and be responsible, (ok I lied) but also because I lived a carefree life. Take a moment and come down memory lane with me as I reminisce on being a kid...this should be fun.

While searching the internet I was able to come up with these memories with helpful links from

Puckermob.com

Game System

Super Nintendo 

When my brother received Nintendo for Christmas he’d sneak on it all the time on school nights. I would get envious because he rarely got caught. When coming home from school my mom played it hogging up our playtime. We all wanted to play on the game system and it was evident the Nintendo was taking over our lives, well except for my dad’s because he was working. My brother would be player 1 and I followed behind as player 2. We played Mario’s World and sat up for hours trying to beat one level. The different boards were fascinating and we went through a lot just to rescue a princess. Who would of thought a small man with red overalls could have so much superpowers?

Sega Genesis also became popular in the 90s, which brought some competition to Nintendo (I guess). Sonic was the face of Sega Genesis and kids would compare which one was better. I loved playing Sega Genesis and having Tails as my player. Mortal Kombat was also another popular game and people would get into serious arguments over who was going to be who...oh yea, it was serious! 

Television

90s television shows kept houses contained. However, there’s nothing like Saturday morning cartoons. I would eat my bowl of cereal with my pajamas on watching cartoons until noon. Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network seemed to be at a battle, but I was a Nickelodeon kid, Cartoon Network never had a chance after I watched reruns of Doug, Hey Arnold, and the infamously Rugrats. Family shows were also a 90s favorite. The Prince of Bel-Air, Martin, In Living Color, and Living Single caught my attention during the week nights. Conversations at the school lunch table was at its all time high when talking about these shows.

Cassette Tape

Music

Cassette tapes were famous and people were known to have a boom box in close distance. If the tape became messed up sticking a number 2 pencil inside the circle and rewinding it, was the way to put it back in its place. They were fun to have and easy to record over. Side A was mostly popular than side B, but before CD’s and iTunes cassette tapes were an importance in the 90s!

Free and AJ from 106&Park

Music videos became famous and as a preteen watching 106 & Park was a must. It was something about guessing who was going to be number one that was exciting. Some days it was obvious while other times it was hard to tell. Free and AJ were the host that made 106 & Park come alive. Celebrities that were at the peak of their career stopped by to talk about their album, and a performance from a celeb was a bonus. Every teen in the 90s ran home to watch the show at 6:00pm. It seemed as if watching it was a bundle of fun and a remarkable memory.

AOL

Growing up in the 90s was pretty simple. AOL landed its stomping grounds into many homes. My cousins would argue all the time about who was getting on. We didn’t care how long dial up would take, getting in the chatrooms was exciting. But, if someone was on the computer you better not pick up the phone or the computer would mess up. A person spent hours online chatting with a complete stranger and for some reason that was okay. The more chat rooms the better the conversations appeared to be. There's something about hitting those keys behind a keyboard that made people fell powerful. 

America Online 

The scrapbooker's lament - I know I’ve got it here somewhere

I bought eight (very expensive) packages of Jolie’s Big Ben stickers for my first England scrapbook - I kept going back to A.C. Moore and buying the same ones over and over again because I forgot what I had stashed away.  Unfortunately, when I finally got around to making the scrapbook, I discovered that I only took two photos of Big Ben.  I really liked those stickers but there was no way to put all eight of them on one page with just two 4X6 prints.  Ok, problem solved. I simply took another trip to London in 2014 so I could use up the stickers.  I know, the solution was a bit extreme but all my scrapbooking friends agreed that it was the best alternative.  On my second trip, I purposely took nine pictures of Big Ben (enough for three great layouts) and now I can’t find those stupid leftover stickers from my original trip.

This cautionary tale of illusive stickers illustrates the need to keep scrapbook projects and materials organized.  Maria Gracia of Get Organized Now writes in her blog that getting scrapbook supplies into some sort of orderly storage makes them easier to retrieve when needed and helps to eliminate duplicate purchases.  Why didn’t I read this before I spent $40 on those Big Bens? Her 50 Ideas to Get Organized and Enjoy Your Scrapbooking Hobby includes:

“USE WHAT YOU HAVE FIRST. Resist the urge to buy a million new papers, punches, and so on, until you’ve used some of the craft supplies you already have. Unless you’re planning on opening a  scrapbooking warehouse, it’s best to be choosy before emptying your wallet on new items, when you already have items you could use in  your current supply.”
 

 

But beware!  Scrapbook organization is not for the faint-of-heart. Keeping paper organized is hard enough but adding punches, stickers, and embellishments takes Herculean effort.   And some of the organizational systems on the market are outrageously expensive - the Cadillac of scrapbook organization, The Original Scrapbox, costs over $1200.  But scrapbookers don’t have to invest in specialized furniture to get everything in its place. Inexpensive plastic containers, jars, and even Ziplock bags work great for taming scrapbook clutter.  Scrapbook blogger Kim Layton says “I don’t want to stash things away where I’ll never see them, so I try to organize in a way that keeps my pretty supplies in sight and right at my fingertips when creativity strikes.”  Her 12 creative and inexpensive storage ideas are budget-friendly and cover many types of scrapbooking necessities.  
 

 

Just as much effort should go into craft room design as goes into designing a scrapbook page. The team at Apartments.com says “Turning your chaotic scrapbook room into a place you love requires some creativity and planning. It should be as inviting to look at as a favorite page in your scrapbook.” Their website offers 8 organization tips that work for any size space.   However, if your interior design experience is limited to watching Joanna Gaines on HGTV as she effortlessly creates a craft room on Fixer-Upper, you should probably get some practical advice from The Keeper of Memories before you begin.  If I had only seen her blog post 5 Mistakes to Avoid When Organizing Your Creative Space sooner, I might not still be hunting for Big Ben.
 

I started this hobby (read that “obsession”) in 1999 and I have seen many new innovations. My daughter-in-law will look at my latest scrapbook and remark, “Oh, I see you got a ______________ (fill in the blank with snowflake punch, tag maker, paper crimper, corner rounder, etc.)” Something new comes along, all my friends have it and I believe I can’t be creative without it.  I convince myself it will be perfect for scrapbooking my trip to Hawaii, or France, or my Christmas 2008 photos, or my nephew’s graduation party, or some other “pending” project on my to-do list yet many of these must-haves now sit abandoned because something else came along.  Organizing expert Aby Garvey founded simplify 101 on the philosophy that life is more fun when things are organized.  Her affordable online classes let clients “create customized organizing systems that cut clutter and reduce stress.” Aby writes, “It’s perfectly acceptable to donate unused supplies. Simply grab a bag and collect a few easy items… and donate your castoffs to a local school, daycare center or retirement center.”  From her lips to God’s ears.
 

 

 

Scrapbook blogger Ali Edwards sums up the real reason to get organized. “Remember, my goal is to not spend a lot of time organizing stuff. My goal is to make stuff… I want options… not excess. I don't need every color of album, every letter sticker option, etc. I want breathing room in here.”  My thoughts exactly.