The Time My Fourteenth Birthday Became a National Tragedy

To many it was just a typical Tuesday, but I was especially excited because it was my fourteenth birthday! I was in the eighth grade and in middle school speak, that meant you were royalty. I brought in a variety of beautifully decorated cupcakes for my homeroom class, much to my classmates’ delight. Plus, I had finally gotten my ugly braces off after enduring them for three long years.

I was feeling on top of the world!

Throughout the morning my friends, classmates and teachers alike, greeted me and wished me a happy birthday. I was the only one in my grade with a birthday that day and man was I feeling popular. By 10:30am I was in 3rd period, German class and my teacher made an announcement that there had been a terrorist attack in New York. All of a sudden, everything changed. It was September 11th, 2001.

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After German class, the entire middle school gathered into the school theatre for an emergency assembly. It was a mix of conversations – some students knew, some didn’t, some were panicked about their families…plenty of questions, plenty of confusion. The middle school head tried to explain and put our 11-14 year-old minds at ease, but it was impossible.

It was a strange time, to see your teachers - those you admire, just as confused and scared as the students. The rest of the day was just a strange, out-of-body experience. The entire day was spent talking about the attacks. Teachers did their best to answer questions, but they had just as many questions as we did.

At the end of the day, my mom picked me up and the ride home was quiet. For those who know my mom, she is never quiet. I’m sure she was racking her brain trying to figure out how to process this and what to say to me.

“Do I ignore it for now and try and make sure she has a good rest of her birthday?”

“Do we talk about it now or wait?”

“Is she worried, upset, angry?”

When we got home, we turned on our small black and white TV in the kitchen and both sat there for hours just watching the news. How could you not? It was captivating. Horrible. Disgusting. Terrifying. Heartbreakingly captivating.

Several hours later, we both couldn’t take it anymore and went to the local Denny’s, as least to try and celebrate what was left of my birthday. My mom told everyone there it was my birthday, in hopes that would cheer me up. Instead, everyone gave me the same look -- the oh-my-goodness, I’m-so-sorry-your-birthday-is-basically-ruined-now look. Even now, 15 years later when people find out my birthday is September 11th, I still get that look.

One aspect that has stuck with me is the association 9/11 or September 11th has with people. No other event in our nation’s history is referred to solely by its date. The exception I suppose was December 7th, 1941. But even still, the event is called a variety of names – the “Attack on Pearl Harbor,” “Bombing on Pearl Harbor,” “The Day that Will Live in Infamy.” 9/11 is not just a date on the calendar anymore, it is a terrorist attack and it will forever be that way.

Today, I still struggle with how to process everything. Of course, it’s unfortunate that these attacks happened on my fourteenth birthday and it can be hard to feel happy or excited when the rest of the country is in mourning every year. In reality though, I didn't lose anyone that day - my family, my friends, my house, my school - everything was fine. I was healthy and safe unlike so many others.

How do you put such a strange juxtaposition into perspective?